Savoir-Agir@Work

According to Professor Bernard Roth at Stanford, swapping one word for another could make all the difference in how you approach your goals.

When you use the word "but", you create a conflict (and sometimes a reason) for yourself that does not really exist. In other words, when you use the word "and", your brain gets to consider how it can deal with both parts of the sentence. It's possible to do both — you just need to find a solution.

It’s easy and natural to want to tell a customer they are wrong in what they are saying. However, this won’t help you in your efforts to diffuse a customer from getting more upset while sharing a complaint.

Put your ego aside and instead of challenging their complaint, listen to what they are saying, then just as calmly reply by telling them what you have to say.

If customers get angry or start yelling, employ calming techniques to defuse the situation. Keeping your tone of voice even can compel someone who's screaming to lower their voice.

When customers go off on tangents or are indecisive, bring them back to the issue at hand by asking pertinent questions.

Knowing how to identify and handle difficult consumers can help you turn a negative situation into an opportunity to build a stronger relationship.

Customers who complain are actually giving you another opportunity to prove them that you really offer quality service despite a shortfall.

Be prepared to deal with complaints as seamlessly, professionally and graciously as possible. When you do, they share their new experience with others about the strong customer care they received from you... and this old-fashioned way of getting a good reputation never goes out of style.

A single person with a poor attitude – someone who is chronically negative – can destroy the morale of an entire team if left unchecked. If that person reports to you, deal with it at once. If it’s your teammate, ask him (her) to stop. If it’s you, think about how much your complaining is harming your team, your reputation and your future.

One way to deal with criticism and complaints is to not insist on proving your clients that you are right and they are wrong.

It's tempting to challenge criticism, to explain your procedures, to justify the choices. When you do that, it makes it more difficult for the client to share his truth, to feel heard, and the back and forth it generates inevitably escalates the tension.

Instead... Accept the feedback. Don't judge. Sit on the same side of the table and search the best path forward.

Blaming is often a natural response when things go wrong. The biggest disappointment is that it doesn’t work. Nothing is as professional as the ability to get to the heart of a problem and fix it – without bothering to place blame.

We often get locked into arguments that hook our ego into trying to triumph over the other person (client, colleague, superior ...).  It is not a Poker game and engaging in these battles will limit your options at work.

One of the most common reasons for customers to be ungrateful is that they start to perceive that you and the people they deal with just don't care. Data points to the fact that customers will stop appreciating us when they feel we have stopped appreciating them. That's where a focus on customer service and customer service training pays off.

The hysterical customer is usually someone who feels that there is no one on "his side", he has reached the end of his rope, and you have been unfortunate enough to be at the tail end of what got him there. You may not have been the cause of all his problems, but he is nevertheless looking to you for the solutions.

Dealing with him is simple. Be patient. Listen intently. Acknowledge your understanding and express empathy.

Try it. Even if you can't solve his problem, you'll be surprised at how positively he will respond.

We all know the proverb: "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me."  But is it really better to be safe than sorry? We often try to avoid being naive, shielding ourselves from being fooled. But living on high alert all the time is very demanding and little rewarding. By being willing to be trusting, you might get deceived again, but that’s the price of trust. If you are solid, you’ll get back up on your feet, dust yourself off and continue on your path.  

Research has shown that offering even a small act of kindness can boost oxytocin levels (known as the "feel-good" hormone). Meaning that even in a difficult situation, by choosing to be nicer, trusting or generous to your clients or colleagues, will most likely make you feel better.

Failure is uncomfortable. Each time we encounter failure, we learn about ourselves and what we have to overcome. Failure doesn’t mean that you failed but that your plan failed.

A customer is angry due to a problem. Self-assurance allows you to avoid taking this anger personally. Keep in mind: You are not part of the problem, you are part of the solution!